it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
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