just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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