we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
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The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
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You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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