the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
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