So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize