I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
We have started to decorate penises.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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