I am in a vortex of obligation.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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