the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize