He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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