Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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