i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Randomize
