she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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