pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
My cat gives me a boner
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
