remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Randomize
