guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
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