sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
