Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
