I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
