Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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