Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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