Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
