wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Randomize
