I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
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