Im at strip club and am horny
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
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hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
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Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you