i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
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today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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