Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
