You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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