is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Randomize