then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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