1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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