Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
