So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Randomize
