well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
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