Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
