Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
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i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
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Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Alive.
So much puke
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
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