When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize