dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
What a dumb baby whore.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
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