I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize