I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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