Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
