1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
