Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Randomize
