Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize