just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
whose parrot is this?
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
