we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
