Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
