I want to stick my p in your. b.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
