I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
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