the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
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