we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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