I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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